


Empty as a bird's wing

by TheSirenix



Category: Naruto
Genre: F/M, Humor, Post-Canon, Romance, and there isnt enough of him, i love kankurou
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-07-28
Updated: 2020-08-09
Packaged: 2021-03-06 05:27:13
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 4,676
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25578040
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheSirenix/pseuds/TheSirenix
Summary: Natsume Hyuuga is many things, but these days she's mostly just tired of seeing ghosts in every corner and sick of everyone trying to help. Good thing Suna's hospital is in need of some TLC and Shizune is happy to send her off to help.
Relationships: Kankurou (Naruto)/Original Female Character(s)
Comments: 2
Kudos: 9





	1. the search for something

**Author's Note:**

> “What draws us into the desert is the search for something intimate in the remote."  
> -Edward Abbey
> 
> This is a product of my little sister getting sick of me bugging her with story ideas instead of writing something down. So this is actually her OC but between the 2 of us we've come up with a silly little story for her. Love you bumblebee! <3

Natsume Hyuuga has been accused of many things, but lack of control has very seldom been one of them. Placing her teacup down roughly, she almost regrets that fact. Right now, she wishes that it was in her to scream. 

“I do not need any help, Lady Hinata. My current accommodations are fine and I spend enough time with the family as is,” she grinds out as politely as possible given the scenario. 

“I understand if you feel a bit smothered Natsume, but you must understand that we’re just concerned for you.” Hinata says, worried but firm. 

Natsume knows this, of course they're concerned, after the loss of her brother Neji, she’s been even less forthcoming. She can’t help but hold resentment for the woman in front of her who got to see him more than Natsume ever could before his death. 

Natsume loved her brother. And she misses him even more. But in all her memories she’s always watching him walk away. Off to train, off to the main house to watch Hinata, off to a mission, off to war. The last time she saw him was when she watched him walk away to the battlefield. Now, months after the war, Konoha seems to be filled with his shadow. Every street corner, every hallway, every training ground seems to hold some shard of his ghost. Shards of new and old regrets.

The tea room she sits in now, at the insistence of Hinata and Hanabi, even reminds her of him and it just makes her irritation boil over. 

“Please excuse me, Lady Hanabi, Lady Hinata,” Natsume doesn't make eye contact, not sure if she can keep everything inside her right now, “I have a shift at the hospital in an hour and I still have to get ready. Thank you for the tea.” 

With all the poise and grace of a Hyuuga, Natsume stands up and bows before making her way out of the head family’s house. Behind her the sisters share a look. 

<)OoOoOoOoO(>

The sight that greets her at the hospital is not surprising, yet still disappointing. Genma Shiranui, a tokubetsu jounin and a known flirt, is standing in front of the nurses’ station with his usual senbon between his lips and a smile that oozes charm. Natsume is not a betting woman, its beneath her, but if she was, she would put her money on this being yet another escape attempt instead of him trying to get her number. It’s almost sad, if she hadn’t arrived early for her shift, he may have just been successful. 

Smoothing down her medic-nin apron, Natsume strides towards the first victim of her shift, her shinobi sandals silent as she stalks. 

“-maybe you can let me out a little early, and then we can go grab some coffee?” she hears him purr. The nurse at the station, a pretty woman with long brown hair, giggles in response. 

“Shiranui,” Natsume calls blandly, “what do you think you’re doing out of bed?” 

His body freezes, the once charming smile now stiff. 

“A-ah, Hyuuga-sensei! I was just speaking to uh-” he hastily looks to the nurses name tag “-Miko here.” 

One does not need a byakugan to see through his bullshit. 

“That is not an excuse to be out of bed, Shiranui. How about I help you back?” she gives him her best ‘I am not in the mood for this’ smile as she offers him her arm. 

Natsume has to admit, he recovers well when he takes her arm with only a slightly forced delightful smile. This doesn’t mean she will let him get away with it though, so she grabs his arm and makes sure to dig slightly into the bruise she knows is on his wrist. Not enough to be considered malicious, but enough to be punishing. 

She has been working at this hospital too long, and by now most shinobi know that she is one of the doctors you shouldn’t be messing with. On a one on one fight, Natsume will always be at a disadvantage, she is not a true shinobi, instead she had focused everything into being a med-nin. But here in these halls she is a queen and this is her castle. 

As they pass the nurses’ station, she sees the young nurse, Miko, looking longingly after the jounin. Natsume catches her gaze with a glare, and the poor girl looks away quickly. 

“Shiranui this is the third attempt this week. Is there something unsatisfactory about your room?” 

“What? Of course not! With you here, where else would I be?” he says in a rush, nervousness shading his tone. Natsume raises a disbelieving eyebrow but chooses not to pursue whatever that means. 

“Very well, then I’m sure you won’t mind staying in bed until you’re released tomorrow, yes?” she says, helping him back into his room. 

He looks at her like a kicked puppy but nods anyways. She makes a mental note to check his room in a few hours to make sure he’s still here. Hopefully she won’t have to spend her shift hunting him down. Again. Once he’s settled, she turns on her heel with a careless wave tossed over her shoulder and walks out the door. One of the nurses should come past soon for his checkup, no need for her to hang around.

<)OoOoOoOoO(>

Her apartment is quiet when she turns on the lights, her mind and body exhausted after such a long shift. Her mood only seemed to get worse when she had to not only track down Genma again, but had to deal with nurses and patients giving her a wide berth sensing the turn of her mood. Making her way to the shower she passes her kitchen table and her eye is caught on an application form. 

The paper itself is not so interesting, but the opportunity it holds is a tempting one. Shizune, the director of the hospital, had passed it to her a few days ago. Suna had sent a request to Konoha for medics to overhaul and upgrade their hospital, and Natsume was being asked to lead it. 

The offer is a balm to an old hurt, when Lady Tsunade had first come to the village, and took a small pink haired kunoichi as her protégé instead of one of the top apprentices in the hospital. Natsume knows it wasn’t personal, but the sting of being passed over for someone both younger and less experienced than her had hit hard for an arrogant 14-year old who put too much stock in fate and destiny. These days she still holds fate in high regards, but as a doctor she chooses to fight it. 

Turning away she continues to the bathroom. The apartment is small, but neat and all hers. Located a 10-minute walk away from the hospital and another 20-minute walk from the Hyuuga compound, she loves it, even when the quiet becomes suffocating. 

The shower is a short one, she has to hurry to make it to the main house for supper. But her state of mind is worlds better and she feels refreshed. Dressing in a simple light purple kimono, fashioned with a black obi and white birds stitched along the hem, Natsume feels another surge of annoyance. She loves her family, but she just wants to be left alone to grieve. Getting ready for an awkward night of ‘let's talk about our feelings’ poorly disguised as a family dinner does not help her mood either. 

The night air is cool on her face, and the breeze ruffles her short dark brown hair. The sky is clear, stars twinkling like spilled glitter, and the autumn leaves add a ruffle to the peaceful atmosphere. It’s a lovely night, and it’s a shame to waste it fending off concerned looks and unwieldy affection. 

<)OoOoOoOoO(>

Dinner is silent, the air charged with words yet to be said. Hiashi sits at the head of the table, on one side is Hanabi and Natsume, on the other sits Hinata and Naruto. Naruto’s presence isn’t wholly unexpected, he is dating Hinata, but it did raise an eyebrow from Natsume when he had greeted her at the door. 

It’s during the main course, a delightful meal of grilled salmon and rice, when Hinata not-so-subtle nudges her boyfriend in the ribs with her elbow, giving him a meaningful look that he needs a moment to understand. He quickly straightens out his posture, as if remembering why he was here in the first place. He clears his throat, drawing the attention of everyone at the table. Natsume pauses in the middle of taking a bite, lowering the chopsticks away from her face when she notices he is focused on her. 

“Natsume...” he begins hesitantly, “we all have been... worried about you lately. We know you’re grieving, we all are, but you’ve blocked yourself off from everyone and we are concerned that you’re just hurting yourself even more...” 

And just like that, the charge in the air seems to strike her in the chest. Maybe she should have seen this coming but right now her only concern is getting out. Getting out of this awful conversation and this awful dinner. Away from this room and back to the safe, suffocating silence of her little apartment. 

“You were opening up really well before... well before, and now you’re barely speaking to anyone. I know you’ve already said no to Hanabi and Hinata’s offer, but we all agree that it would only help everyone if we knew you were safe and close by! Please reconsider?” he finishes with an award-winning smile. 

In fact, maybe she will forgo the apartment entirely and just run out of the gates. She’s heard Kiri has been doing well, and tourist season is coming up soon. If only it were so simple. It’s not that she doesn’t appreciate their concern, but that she doesn’t want nor need it right now. 

Natsume misses her twin brother something fierce. She also knows that it wasn’t anyone’s fault except the traditions of their family that had him spending more time with the people in front of her instead of his own sister. She also knows that her pulling away isn’t what he would want either, but it is something she wants. She has spent a lifetime trying to play catch up to a prodigy and trying to embody the perfect Hyuuga woman to keep her elders happy by honing herself to an example of a perfect traditional lady. 

For the most part she succeeded. She cut her losses after graduating the academy, knowing she could never match her brother in combat and instead focused on medical jutsus. She perfected her mask, she is gentle and soft spoken, always polite and always on time. Wherever she goes, there is never a hair out of place or a speck of dirt found on her clothes. She never loses her calm outside the privacy of her bedroom and she always takes whatever is thrown at her in stride. 

Right now, she wishes she would allow herself the pleasure of throwing the finely carved chopstick still held loosely in her hand at the blonde man. He’s just the messenger, but she really hates his message. 

Quietly she sets down her bowl and chopsticks with a clack that seems to ring out in the anticipating silence. They will be getting no response from her. Delicately, she dabs a napkin at her lips and with stiffly polite smile she rises to her feet. 

“Thank you for the meal,” she says quietly with a bow to the table, “may you all have a pleasant evening.” and in an echo of the tea session this morning Natsume once again glides out the room. Behind her she can hear the clatter of dishes as they seem to finally take in her reaction and move to respond. “Natsume-!” she hears Hinata call after her, but she closes the door with a firm click before anything else can be said. 

By the time she gets home, she’s exhausted and annoyed. The only thought she concerns herself with is how soon she can crawl into bed and have this day be over. Storming past her kitchen, a flash in the corner of her eye draws her attention, hand hovering over the door of her bedroom. Sitting exactly where she left them were the papers for the Suna medic exchange program. The temptation, especially after the day she had, is just too much. Moving slowly, she sits down and picks up a pen she had thrown nearby after a shift a few days ago. 

<)OoOoOoOoO(>

Shizune was having a good morning. Her workload was hitting a small slump and had slowed down considerably, her coffee was the perfect temperature and, after taking a sip, she found it was also absolutely delicious. This is was going to be a good day, she felt it in her bones. 

There was a knock at the door. 

Before she could call out, the door was opened and Natsume Hyuuga strode in, looking poised but after closer inspection the dark smudges under her eyes shared a different story. Keeping her eyes on the floor, Natsume placed a small stack of papers on Shizune’s desk. With a raised eyebrow, she pulls the stack closer and gives it a cursory glance. The application for the Suna program. Shizune will admit she is surprised, when she extended the offer to the Hyuuga it was more an optimistic gamble. With this new information, she’ll have to reorganize the roster to ensure the nurses and doctors going will be compatible to work under Hyuuga’s specific standards, lest the team become rebellious. Presenting a united front to our allies and all that. 

“You are clear on all the terms of this program, right? You will be out of village for a minimum of 3 years, and you will be expected to train a new team of Suna medic-nin.” Shizune said, sounding skeptical. 

Natsume wanted to be offended at the lack of faith in her patience, but she’s worked with the other woman for long enough that they both know her tolerance for people who are slow is very limited. 

“I understand.” she says firmly. 

Shizune narrows her eyes at the statue of a woman in front of her, internally debating if she should pursue further or just accept the good fortune presented to her. 

Today is a good day dammit, and honestly, she doesn’t want to push her luck any further. She’s already going to have to do extra work to accommodate her good fortune. 

“Alright then. Your team will meet you at the western gate a week from now at sunrise. You’ll get the full roster for your team tomorrow along with a debriefing on what you’ll be expected to share and what to withhold.” 

<)OoOoOoOoO(>

Natsume is excited. For the first time in what feels like forever the world feels wider than her own grief. The dawn light casts the world in hues of gold, making the surrounding glitter. The air is still chilly but the clear skies promise a warm day. In this light, Konoha feels like a different world entirely. 

Standing in a new outfit, Natsume feels like a new woman. Her old dark purple shirt has been replaced by a lilac short-sleeved turtle-neck dress that falls to mid-thigh over her black shorts. Her thigh-high black socks have also been replaced by mesh. The less black the better she will survive the desert, or so her logic goes. 

Her team are all capable and work well under her direction, now if only she can get them moving before someone tells her family she’s here. As she’s organizing the formation and going over last-minute supply checks, she hears a rush of footsteps behind her and knows her luck has run out. 

“Natsume!” Hinata calls out, not winded but not without a small struggle. 

The woman in question turns to face her, “Lady Hinata,” she greets formally. Behind Hinata, Natsume can see Hanabi and Hiashi walking up the road. ‘Why can’t things be easy?’ She thinks to herself, frustration gnawing at the edges of her thoughts. She almost wants to curse Naruto, who no doubt tattled after hearing about her position in the program from the Rokudaime. 

“Please don’t go, we’re sorry for pushing you but you don’t have to do this!” Hinata puts forward. 

“Lady Hinata, I have already made my decision. It is far too late to change course now,” Natsume can’t hold eye contact, guilt is bubbling in her chest, but the ever-present anger at the world keeps her resolute. She’s ready for a fight, instead Hinata looks crushed, but she draws herself back and what looks like understanding flashes in her pale eyes. 

Hanabi and her father have caught up now and both seem to already know that Natsume will not be turned from her path. Hanabi catches her eye first put does little more than give her a confident nod, which seems to carry more meaning than any collection of words could. Moving her gaze to Hiashi, the guilt in her chest begins to bubble again. She knows that he is the one person who can truly understand her heartache. 

“When you are ready, you will have a place here.” is all he says. That one sentence cuts her for a moment. It’s all the comfort she’s wanted these past few months, and hearing it now when she is about to leave for years hurts all the more. Regardless of the timing, it warms her heart. 

“I’ll be in contact,” Natsume says slowly, catching each of their eyes in turn. Around her, other families hug their loved ones close, tears and conversation flowing all around, but in this little bubble of lilac eyes making contact with each other something intimate and meaningful passes between this family. They have never been an over expressive family, so this is as close as they will get. 

Her 2nd in command, a fellow med-nin with scruffy short hair and stubble to match, frantically waves to grab her attention. 

Time is up. 

On impulse Natsume reaches out and grabs Hinata’s hand and gives it a gentle squeeze. Before she can have regrets or change her mind, she turns on her heel and takes command of the group. 

Waiting in front of the gate stands the Hokage, Hatake Kakashi. His gaze is assessing as it sweeps over the outbound team. Natsume wants to say she expected more when all he does is give them a jaunty wave and wishes them good luck, but then she would be a liar and also deaf to have not heard the rumors surrounding the Copy-Nin and his odd personality. She gives him a respectful bow, and behind her she knows her team is doing the same. 

Then they’re off, and with the sun and wind on her face the future feels brighter than ever.


	2. faraway place of little rain

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "You should not see the desert simply as some faraway place of little rain. There are many forms of thirst."  
> -William Langewiesche
> 
> Natsume arrives in Suna!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's chapter 2! I've started school courses again so this was a nice little stress relief. Hope you enjoy!

Unsurprisingly, Suna was hot. Very hot. It almost made Natsume regret this entire adventure, and she had only just arrived. 

The gates were imposing, rising high into the sky and made from the same sandstone as the surrounding cliffs were. The wind which blew over the dunes was warm and dry, carrying the heavy scent of dust with it. Natsume, who led the team, was the first to spot the gate guards. They all wore similar shades of tawny brown attire and light cream or white headwraps, some had them over their faces as well. One of them stood out, a man wearing all black, with odd marks on his face and a hood with cat ears. She’s unsure if he was born with the markings or if he paints them on, for his sake she hoped it was the latter. 

She hailed their group with a polite wave and moved to intercept their greeter, her team followed. He’s taller than her by at least a head, and swaggered as he moved towards her. The wave he gave is jaunty and paired with a friendly smile, he appeared very amicable. 

“Konoha!” he addressed her when he got closer. 

Natsume acknowledged this with a quirked brow but smoothed over her face quickly, the last thing she wanted to do was offend an ally, especially as they may need to get along for the next few years. 

“Hyuuga Natsume, head doctor of our team.” she bowed politely. 

“Hey no need to be so formal,” he casually shrugged her greeting off, “the name is Kankurou, I’ll be taking you to your accommodations and show you all the hospital.” 

Ire bubbled in her gut at his easy-going display. Taking in a deep breath she decided it was better to just let it go. Nodding politely, she gestured to the medical personnel behind her to follow. The sooner they got this over with the sooner they could rest and then get started on their work. Hopefully away from the too-casual guide. 

Suna was unexpectedly beautiful. Walking through the gates revealed a sprawling city surrounded by cliff faces on all sides. The yellow sandstone of the round buildings was so vastly different from the pale white walls and red roofs of Konoha, she imagined that sunset in this city would cause it to probably glitter like gold. Natsume was so distracted by the unfamiliar surroundings she almost missed the way their guide- Kankurou- kept casting glances at her. After the 4th time she turned her head to face him as they walked. 

“Yes?” she said slowly. The way he startled at being caught would be more amusing if she wasn’t exhausted from the journey here. 

“Uh- I was just- um your eyes...” he trailed off. 

She will admit, it took Natsume a moment to process his words. Right, this was not Konoha. 

“What about them?” she ground out, already over this conversation. 

“They’re just uh- unique?” he smiled sheepishly. 

“They’re a dojutsu, I should hope not many people have them outside of Konoha.” she said blandly, ending the conversation and turned back to look at the surroundings again. 

Kankurou turned to face forward as well, embarrassment sat heavily in his throat at her dismissive demeanor towards his blunder. 

<)OoOoOoOoO(>

Kankurou has regrets. Many, many regrets. Like the time he was playing around with a new poison and was found paralyzed by a laughing Temari. Or the time he was helping Gaara with paperwork late one night and fell asleep, leaving an imprint of his face all over hours' worth of work. 

Right now, he kind of regrets opening his stupid mouth. At the gate, he had been a bit startled when the short Konoha kunoichi had introduced herself so stiffly, he thought Konoha shinobi would be more... open, like the Uzumaki. Naturally, she was also quite pretty, all aristocratic features and a slender figure, but it was her eyes that held his interest. He remembered seeing only a handful of shinobi in the war who had had similar pale eyes, but up close they really were something otherworldly. Only, when he had tried to compliment her, it came out all wrong when the full force of her gaze fell on him causing him to lose his words. 

She was cold, her face never showed anything beyond polite indifference. But Kankurou had managed to understand Gaara, and he was not about to give in so easily. 

Approaching the hospital, he stopped her in front of the door. 

“Hey,” he said, drawing that icy gaze “if you’d allow, I’d love to show you around Suna sometime.” 

All he had got in return was a raised eyebrow. Okay so maybe his approach could have been better, maybe a lot less direct. Sue him, you miss all the shots you don’t take and she was his type. Maybe if he’s lucky the road will swallow him quickly. 

“Aah,” she drawled out, “I’ll be quite busy with the hospital. Thank you for your kind offer.” 

Her refusal was diplomatic, Kankurou was actually a bit jealous at how nothing seemed to make her pause. Conceding, he moved aside and watched her walk into the building, when she turned back to him, he gave her a friendly wave. Seeing as he was to play liaison between her team and the Kazekage, he knew he’d be seeing her again soon. 

<)OoOoOoOoO(>

Compared to Konoha General, Suna Hospital was a mess. Considering Konoha had had the likes of Tobirama and Tsunade Senju, while Suna did not, Natsume could hardly fault them. When she was through though, this place would be a true contender to rival her home. 

After the interaction with their guide outside, she had made a hurried tactical retreat to what looked like the main desk of the hospital. There was no way she would even entertain the idea of getting to know the foreign shinobi, especially seeing as he insulted her eyes in the first 10 minutes of knowing each other and she had an important job she would really rather be doing instead. The happy little wave he had gave when she checked to see if he was gone did not endear her further. 

After speaking with the secretary at the front desk, Natsume had been shuffled around to the different departments to get an idea of what the situation was here. This went on for a good few hours before she was unceremoniously dumped in front of large wooden door. Inside was a stuffy office, the blinds behind the desk overladen with papers were half closed, yet that hardly seemed to help with how intense the desert sun was. The whole office was illuminated in the bright glow of the early evening light. 

The meeting with the stern old hospital director was a test in patience. Natsume was hardly deterred, this was her project and she would give it her all. She was young yes, but in a world after the 4th war there were a lot of young people in high-up positions. She could already tell that she would have to be extra conscience of how she suggested changes, the last thing anyone needed was new enemies and something told her he would be less forgiving than Shizune. 

They could both at least agree that the official introduction between her team and the hospital staff would wait until the morning when everyone was rested. The Konoha team’s duties would be extended to cover both training Suna’s staff in medical ninjutsus and reworking their filing system. Natsume bet Shizune was back in her office laughing at her. She figures this is karma for all the paperwork she dodged over the years. 

<)OoOoOoOoO(>

Leaving the hospital, she’s faced with the evening light. In Konoha the sunset had never been quiet this red, more purple hues that would stretch into the dark blue of the night. Suna on the other hand was all red’s and orange’s, even at its darkest the sky was less dark blue and more a dark purple. The stars here were the same ones she knew in Konoha but somehow seemed almost brighter in this new, unfamiliar sky. 

Natsume trudged back to her dorm, exhaustion pulling her small frame down as she walked through the quieter street. It was still dry but not nearly as warm as it was earlier, the temperature dropping quite rapidly. Her thoughts wander away from her as she follows her second, Kaito, back towards the dorms Kankurou-san had shown them earlier. 

Thoughts of the guide crossed her mind and she almost scrunched her nose up in irritation. She will admit he was eye-catching, wearing all black in the desert and his face painted in bright magenta. He reminds her of the warnings they got in the academy about venomous animals and their bright colorings’. She will admit that maybe the long journey here had made her a bit snappish in their interactions, but she’s hardly sorry for cutting him off so abruptly. Natsume also kind of hopes she won’t have to face him again anytime soon either...


End file.
